I wanna bring you to show and tell
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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