awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize