Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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