I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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