so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Randomize
