Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
