We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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