I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
