East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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