Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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