Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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