I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize