Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
