Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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