Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Randomize
