I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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