so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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