pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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