Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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