He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Holy shit dude........stairs
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize