there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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