woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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