Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
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Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
We were destined to go to rehab together
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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