she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
just tell him i said nine months
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
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She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
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Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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