She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
