hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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