dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
