thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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