It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
