i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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