i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
