My brain says no but my pants say off.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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