Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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