Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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