I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
