He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
