yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
