I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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