Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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