I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
