I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
