I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
