dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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