Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
not ubering you a puppy
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
