I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
