i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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