Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
