You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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