I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Help me help you realize you are a moron
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
