So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
