So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize
